So.....I had this dream the other night.....

Moment's after waking from it with a thumping heart, it dawned on me that I had relived my actual birth....

the background to the dream is me attending a party in a house - the party was promoted as the best ever to be and full of interesting things to watch..the star attraction at the party was Mariah Carey! I think I was somehow part of the group that organised it..the party was taking place in a huge house and everybody was welcome.

I remember that there was a man, he was my beloved, he had a look of Patrick Bergin when he was starring in that movie with Julia Roberts 'Sleeping with the enemy'..all mustachioed and ticklish..my darling beloved (as the dream revealed) had a day job of being an architect but he was running the bar at this collosal party...as a further aside he was tinkling away on the ivories of a grand piano at the end of the bar whilst keeping a watchful eye on the staff..

I, full of adoration for this wonderful specimen of manliness, had bent down and whispered in his ear that he was doing a great job and to tell him that I loved him very much..

suddenly, in my dream I was whisked off to some corridor leading to the toilets...I was bursting..my head was full of heady thoughts about what a wonderful and blessed existence I was living..so I get to the toilet cubicle, do what is required and then ...

....as I open the door, I discover that I can barely squeeze my head through a gap which appears to front onto 'the god's' at some movie theater..the people sat in the audience were watching a premiere of some incredible and unique animated film video of some very individual and innovative music group who were expected to blow the minds of their audience...I was momentarily distracted from my surprise that I'd ended up there by the graphics on the big screen..

Then, I realised that my head was stuck and I had no way of escaping the accidental trap I found myself in..I moved my head, this way and that...it seemed impossible that I would ever escape...I was so frightened...

..but I managed to find a way..magically..I 'unhinged' a 'gate/half door' which allowed my body, head and shoulders first to be free!!!!!

The 'release' was fast and furious ..before I knew it..the awful stress of feeling trapped became one of feeling like I was hanging on for dear life to the 'door' which symbolically was my entrance to a new world...for beneath me, there was nothing but an abyss...I was so convinced that if i let go of my grip I would never stop falling and I did not feel safe..I was scared shitless..I was exposed to something very unfamiliar..the abyss..empty, dark symbolising an uncertain fate?

for some mad reason..my 'concious logical self' kicked in right there and then and informed my screwed up subconscious me that I was relieving a traumatic event..










What do you think?

I'm still reeling from the out and out stunning amazingness of potentially having relived my birth...dreams are really important to me and I generally rely upon them for messages from either my subconscious or the dead who watch out for me ..including guardian angels and loving family members who wish me good..

I'm trying to figure out the message behind going through that particular experience of birth again...the significance.